We were supposed to meet up today and had been exchanging texts most of the AM trying to figure out when and where. Just as I was about to head out the door, he sent one more text which said "Wait." Low and behold, he forgot about a boot camp holiday party, one in which he couldn't miss. As I was texting back that of course he needed to go to that, and that I hope he would know me well enough to know I would never request he miss it on my behalf, my phone rang. It he was calling. I hesitated answering, because I wasn't mentally prepared to hear his voice. But ultimately I knew that I had to talk to him as sending a crazy amount of texts back and forth was pointless.
And then a funny thing happened. When I answered, I was no longer nervous. My voice didn't crack. I didn't behave in anyway other that how I know to be. It not only surprised me, but I think it surprised him that I wasn't cold or bitchy or otherwise unpleasant. And it gave me the confidence I needed to face him, even if that time would end up being tomorrow rather than today. I was still anxious to a point, and hadn't slept last night, but I know now that this is not something I will regret. In fact, I think I would regret not meeting him.
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